时间:2018-12-08 作者:英语课 分类:背诵为王第一册


英语课

             82                    Three Jokes


 


Joke 1


Clerk in a post office, after weighing the letter: "That letter's too heavy. You'll have to put another stamp on it."Man: "What's the good of that? If I put another stamp on it, that will only make it heavier, won's it?"


Joke 2


"What are you doing, my dear?"said a mother to her four-year-old daughter.  "I'm writing a letter to Helen,"the little girl answered. "But dear,"said the mother, "you don's know how to write."


The little girl continued to make marks on the paper with her pencil and answered: "Well, Helen doesn's know how to read, so it doesn's make any difference."


Joke 3


A school inspector 1 was visiting an English class one day. He found some students were not sure about how to put the letters i or e in the words like receive,"believe,"and ceiling 2."He said: "Students, I can give you a rule. It always works 3 well for me."The students were very interested. Even the teacher seemed eager to learn this important rule.


The inspector continued: "It is simply this: Write the i and the e exactly alike 4 and then put the dot in the middle over them."


 


   inspector  巡视员     receive    收到, 接到 


   believe    相信     ceiling    天花板     dot        , 圆点


                                 笑 话 三 则


笑话1 


邮局的工作人员称过信后:“这封信太重了。你需要再贴一张邮票。”  寄信人:“那样做有什么好处?如果我在信上再贴一张邮票,岂不是更重了?” 


笑话2 


“做什么呢,宝贝?”妈妈问她四岁的女儿。  “我在给海伦写信,”小姑娘回答。  “可是宝贝,”妈妈说,“你不知道怎么写。”  小姑娘继续用铅笔在纸上涂画,答道:“哦,海伦不认识字,所以会写不会写都一样。” 


笑话3 


一天,有个学校巡视员在视察一堂英语课时,发现有些学生拿不准像“receive”、“believe”和“ceiling”这些单词中的字母ie什么在前,什么在后。他说:“同学们,我可以告诉你们一个规律。这个规律对我来说很管用。”学生们很感兴趣,甚至老师也急于想知道这个重要的规律。 


巡视员接着说:“很简单: ie写得很相像,然后在它们上面中间的地方点个点。”


 




1 inspector
n.检查员,监察员,视察员
  • The inspector was interested in everything pertaining to the school.视察员对有关学校的一切都感兴趣。
  • The inspector was shining a flashlight onto the tickets.查票员打着手电筒查看车票。
2 ceiling
n.天花板;(规定价格、工资等的)最高限额
  • It took more or less a whole day to paint the ceiling.粉刷天花板用了将近一整天的时间。
  • A fly is on the ceiling.一只苍蝇在天花板上。
3 works
n.作品,著作;工厂,活动部件,机件
  • We expect writers to produce more and better works.我们期望作家们写出更多更好的作品。
  • The novel is regarded as one of the classic works.这篇小说被公认为是最优秀的作品之一。
4 alike
adj.同样的,相像的;adv.一样地;同程度地 
  • The twins are so alike that I can't tell which is which.这对双胞胎一模一样,我分辨不出谁是谁。
  • All stories seemed dreadfully alike,no matter who told them.看来,不管谁讲,故事都是千篇一律的。
学英语单词
Acetyladalin
alloimmunizations
amphicoronate
auriculariaceaes
badonkadonk
be assumed to be
betroth oneself to
binning it
block transfer function
Boddington
casadonte
cell coordinate
chaulmosulfone
check payable at sight
chinon
concrete joint grinder
Cortébert
coverallss
crazy-busy
deadlift
dispute over
document of resolution
dormant embryo
due professional care
Elko Indian Reservation
famuli
flange of beam
flood-water
fluorescent pH indicator
full graphic panel
hearsay evidence
herding dog
hollyleaf
hydroferricyanic acid
iea
imino-alkyl starches
indicator chart
ion path
isohypocytosis
jack cylinder
keep someone posted
laugh-ter
leaf moulds
line of equal distribution
manganese(iv) chloride
means speed
measure rate
mesh sieve
mesitylol
minimum inventory investment
mispoints
moms
multichannel electric signals comparator
mustons
nanite
neckera yezozna
no cargo on board
nodosa neuritis
non-parametric tolerance limits
ocie
offshore wind
Os cuboideum
perissology
pilot briefer
planting rule
pressure loss for accelerating material
pressurised
Pujunan
pyosalpingo-oothecitis
raise a presumption
raster width
re-memorize
replacement resources
replacement technique
scaffat
scurrilously
semi-feral
shih huo hu
shrugging
sideparking
single tuned circuit
solid-state technique
spherical bend union
steam consumption rate
stump someone
successful tenderer
the all clear
third circle gonimometer
touched bill of health
Trento, Prov.di
tube anemone
ultimate stress
unexplained variance ratio
unspent
vertical tube rotor
vesiculopustular
wagsome
warehousing charge
water content testing apparatus for leather
wild life protection area
worse luck!